This is the second book in the Bible Story poetry series. It features poem stories on every Bible story in the books of Leviticus, Numbers, Deuteronomy, and Joshua.
This is not your typical Bible Story book for small children. It is for teens and adults and provides an entertaining, edgy, humorous, fresh approach to Bible reading while maintaining integrity with the actual Biblical account.
A great source for pastors and youth pastors from which to illustrate their lessons and sermons.
Titles such as: Naughty Boys, Don’t Get Stoned, Nose Vomit, Wise Spies and Gutless Guys, Nutty Staff, Mission Unaccomplished, Family Feud, Israelite Snake Bite, The Ass With Class, Bellyache Mistake, Nun Fun, Ouch, and more.
Here is an example from Numbers 11:
NOSE VOMIT
The Israelites complained about
The food they had to eat
‘Cause manna was their daily meal
And they were craving meat
So Moses was disgusted
And he let Jehovah know
“These dummies you have given me
Have caused a lot of woe”
“I’m sick of all these people
They all act like I’m their father
Why did you save these idiots?
Why did you even bother?”
“They grumbled from the day we left
They built a golden cow
I’m sick and tired of leading them
So please – just kill me now”
I’m not exaggerating
That is really what he said
His cup was full from all their bull
He’d just as soon be dead
The God spoke back to Moses
And he said, “I’ve heard their plea
If they are tired of manna
Then I’ll give a guarantee
For one full month I’ll feed them quail
‘Til it runs out their nose
The meat will stick between their teeth
And some will decompose
And sure enough he sent the quail
It was a clever trick
For weeks that’s all they had to eat
And most of them got sick
And just as God predicted
Quail was dripping through their snout
Their sinus drainage was a mess
They couldn’t blow it out
And some got stuck between their teeth
Where it would putrefy
And if you smelled their stinky breath
You’d probably want to die
God sent his fire and many died
A lesson would be learned
Be careful what you ask for
If the answer gets you burned
BIBLE VERSES
Numbers 11